Welcome To The Community

Together, we’ll dive deep and find the strength to never give up because Great Things Take Time.

Today’s newsletter is a reminder for those of us who find ourselves getting sucked into negativity. We can be better than that.

🚨GTTT Live(ish)🚨 

Swing by the Great Things Take Time Instagram on Tuesday, September 2nd from 12pm-1pm for an Ask Me Anything, where I’ll be on stories answering any questions you have about achieving your Great Things (or whatever else comes up).

If you were forwarded this email, you can subscribe and join the Great Things Take Time Community to get content from me every Monday.

Here's what's in today's email

• Don’t Block The Door

• Moments with Maurice

• What's Got Me Smilin'

Don’t Block The Door

My friend Max says that negativity makes him nauseous, and boy does that hit home.

Think about it:

Remember being a kid at school, or stepping into a room full of new people. Maybe it’s a new job or a new set of individuals you want to impress. It could also be an instance when you’re trying out a new skill, like taking a class, or trying a new workout, or you finally have the confidence to share your craft.

You feel like you’re taking a bit of a risk, venturing into uncharted territories. But in all those situations above, it doesn’t matter how much you’ve practiced your skill, rehearsed what you’re going to say (or sing), or how much confidence you have in your abilities; the people you’re interacting with are unpredictable. You don’t know if they’re going to love you, hate you, or act like you don’t exist. Even worse, they might make fun of your genuine, wholehearted efforts.

Doesn’t that make you want to puke a little?

Negativity isn’t a thing that grows on trees, we humans produce a ton of it when we’re at our worst.

One of my favorite things to remind people of is that everyone has an opinion. A lot of the time, it’s an opinion on something that doesn’t matter to you personally. People will tell you how to dress, act, and what to believe, but they don’t have all the information. 

Below is an example of one of many messages I’ve received. I’m not upset about it, this doesn’t keep me up at night, but makes me wonder what pain and suffering they might be going through. Also, maybe they should subscribe to the newsletter since I did mention it in a Monday newsletter about a bit of a rough patch I went through 😉 

Sports are a great example of this. You’re team fails to make what seems like an easily attainable way to score. To you, it’s obvious, they should have gone right instead of left or tried a completely different play. Dummies.

But what you don’t know is the instruction they got from the coach, the play that always went perfectly in practice, the sweat that got in the player’s eyes, or the injury they were dealing with. There are a million things that go into that moment, yet so many of us find ourselves picking apart situations with anger and rage as if they had run over our pet.

So many of us find moments to remind people that we don’t accept them. That they aren’t welcome. We leave comments, send messages, or find anonymous ways to tear people down. This is especially true when building communities.

When you become part of a community, you find a confidence in the like-minded people you’re surrounded by. All of a sudden, there are others that share your passion! People who get you! 

But sometimes the downside is that you get the “cool-kid” mentality, and now you realize you can gate-keep the feeling of acceptance from others. It feels good to have the power to decide whether or not someone is welcomed into your carefully curated space. There’s a good thing going on; you don’t want to change that. 

If someone is on the outside, then we are more worthy, right?

As a kid,  I was taught to confront negativity and defend myself. To deal with my problems face-to-face and in the moment. In the era of Myspace, I recall a friend who would confront you in person if you posted anything nasty about him. You couldn’t be an internet tough guy if you were around him.

Now, things are different because I’m constantly reminded to leave space for empathy. It’s also the only way I feel like I can get through the day: being reminded that someone is going through something so much deeper that has nothing to do with you. 

They aren’t the first person to hit you with their negativity, and they certainly won’t be the last. Unless this is someone whose opinion you’ve always cared about, keep moving, because their lack of self-reflection has nothing to do with how you should be viewed or how you should view yourself.

So today, this newsletter comes as a reminder of three things:

1. Be proud of who you are and the choices you’ve made. Do things that make YOU proud of your choices and have strong reasons behind them. Don’t live your life to please others; live it to give you something to look back on with pride.

2. Work towards empathy. Whether you’re giving or receiving negativity, stop and try to consider that someone’s lived experiences are different than yours and that you don’t have the full picture. Something being said is usually not a direct attack on you.

3. Don’t block the door. Remember a time when you were on the outside of the circle waiting for someone to let you in. Continue to welcome people in. We’re not the cool kids; we just found community.

Remember that nauseating feeling at the beginning of this newsletter? You have the power to make someone feel that way, but you also have the power to make it so they don’t feel that way. The choice is yours.

Don’t block the door (hold the door? Hodor!), don’t perpetuate the negativity. You know Francis never would, and he’s almost back for the season. Wonder what he’ll have to say about this…?

Moments with Maurice

If you only pause to reflect on your life for one moment today, do it now.

If you’ve been journaling along with me, take the time to pause on the reflection and write down your answer to the prompt. Even if it feels silly in the moment, looking back on what you’ve written down can be eye-opening when you start to see patterns form.

Because no matter what, there is always something to smile about.

Insider Secrets

Yep, I’m no longer 25. Gone are the days of beating my body into the ground (no recovery, no sleep, one too many drinks). In the times that I do find myself going back to my younger ways, I’ve turned to this drink to help with my hangovers. It’s not sponsored, just figured I’d let you in on a secret and maybe give you one less day of pain. Not being hungover? Well, now that makes me smile.

The Downshift

I can just hear the Reddit threads now: “That Adrian, all he does is talk about his car”. So let’s talk about other people’s cars! The photos below are from an FCP Euro car event at Foolproof Brewing.

Take The Leap

This week, I helped photograph my friend Heather Henderson’s product for her new quilting company, The Sunday Quilt Co. My recommendation is that even if you feel stuck or maybe unhappy about something in your life, spend some time around people who are going for their Great Things and fulfilling their dreams. The drive and desire are infectious, and the mood is wonderful.

Remember:

-Adrian